Codependency

When your relationship with someone you love demands more from you than you understand how to give, it can be difficult to maintain boundaries that allow you to feel like your own needs can be met in the relationship. It can often feel like you are not aware anymore of what your own needs are. When loved ones struggle with addiction or other mental health problems, codependency is the result of having a relationship with them and this can be managed so you can be well, even if they are not.

I find treating codependency especially rewarding. It is an issue that is often not talked about, but has an immense impact on the lives of those experiencing it. Often codependency can feel impossible to break out of, but I believe I can help you overcome it!

Codependency is often tied to the relationships that we have with addicts in our lives. Codependency is often defined as behaviors that enable behaviors we wish to see the end of but it often comes from a place of love, care and concern for others. The problem is that love, care and concern can result in giving too much to others. My goal in helping clients who struggle with codependency is to help them establish healthy boundaries so they can be supportive without overwhelming themselves.

Codependency is not an official mental illness, but it is a term that many people identify with. I help clients based on the definition created by the author and codependency expert Pia Mellody. She defines it as having difficulty with: - experiencing appropriate levels of self-esteem - setting functional boundaries - owning our own reality - acknowledging and meeting our own needs and wants and being interdependent with others - experiencing and expressing our reality moderately

Perhaps you seek a “coming home” to yourself in a way that feels safe & meaningful. Perhaps you long to understand yourself in relationships or in the world around you where you consider your needs as much as those around you. Being a people pleaser can lead to compassion fatigue and burnout. I am honored to walk alongside you as we explore and process all that you hold within you. You are allowed to let go, breathe and prioritize your wellbeing.

Codependency most often comes from growing up in a dysfunctional environment with underlying trauma at the core. The manifested symptoms are vast and can include; the belief that you need someone or something outside of yourself to feel whole, being so absorbed by other's problems (addiction, illness, etc) that you don't take care of yourself, having the need to control people and events because you feel out of control inside or being unable to set boundaries or say no.

I have enjoyed being able to work with people on their issues of codependency towards healthy relationships. I will be an advocate for your self-discovery and independent growth, so that you can find yourself with greater insight into your patterns, rather than wait for someone else to tell you what is "wrong with you" and then "fix you." We will discuss independence of identity, worth, self-respect, and boundaries.

Living with codependency can feel like you’re constantly putting others' needs above your own, leaving you drained and disconnected from your true self. But it’s possible to break free from this cycle. In our sessions, we’ll work together to establish healthy boundaries, build self-worth, and empower you to reclaim your independence. Imagine a life where your happiness isn’t tied to others' approval but comes from a place of inner strength and self-respect. I’m here to guide you on this journey.

Codependency is a learned behavior that is often passed down from one generation to the next. It is an emotional and behavioral condition that affects an individual’s ability to have a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship. The good news is that we can learn a new and different way of interacting with others. Through communication and setting boundaries we can learn to feel good about the relationships in our lives.

The way that I engage with people around codependency, which is a confusing term, is that it leads us to want to control other people's emotions so that in turn, we feel better (i.e. I don't want him/her/them to be mad, so I won't say anything). Putting others' emotions and needs ahead of our own is something that is also sanctioned by society. Working on codependency doesn't mean that we start offending others either. It's a gentle journey into boundary setting and communication.

It's hard to fault someone for being compassionate, caring or kind. Sometimes, others prey or take advantage of our kindness and giving spirit. Unknowingly, we give away our power and feel helpless. Learn how to regain your sense of self-respect, security, and independence. I utilize CBT and EMDR therapy to rewire the brain. When we change our thoughts, it changes how we feel, thus altering our actions. You do not have to continue self-doubting and over-explaining yourself!

Jordan helps clients move from painful and draining codependence to a nourishing balance of inter- and independence. Knowledgeable in both 12-step and other recovery networks, Jordan works with her clients to find appropriate support and explore the root cause of codependency.

Codependency may show up as people pleasing and denying one's own needs. I like the famous analogy of being on an airplane: to be in a relationship, we must tend to ourselves (put on our own gas masks before helping others). Life is about relationships and there is none more important than the relationship we have with ourselves. To treat codependency, I draw on the teachings of theorists such as John Bradshaw, Pia Mellody, and Melody Beattie.

I support individuals struggling with codependent behavior and relationship patterns that are no longer serving them.

Do you struggle setting boundaries or knowing what you want? For years I’ve worked with clients who struggle with codependency and low self worth. Codependency is an emotional and behavioral condition that affects an individual’s ability to have a healthy, mutually satisfying relationship. The good news is that we can learn a new and different way of interacting with others. Through communication and setting boundaries we can learn to feel good about the relationships in our lives.